Life is challenging. So often when our lives don’t make sense or seem overwhelming, we ask “why?” or “why me?” Often we miss the point. A much more helpful question would be, “why not?” or “why not me?”

The point of this life experience is to become—to evolve—to learn. If life never offered us any trials or tested our resolve, what would we have known differently about ourselves when life was over? If I am not able to discover the message in the challenge I have missed the opportunity and the moment. Sometimes it comes around again, when I’m hopefully more willing to see the point and other times the opportunity is lost.

The three places I always recommend checking for the source of my challenges in life are first, myself. Is this something I am creating and if so, why? If it is me, I can take 100% responsibility for resolving the challenge. Insecure people lacking in humility usually struggle to see themselves as responsible and thus remain vulnerable to recreating unnecessary challenges they never resolve. The healthier you become, the more willing and capable you are at “owning” the challenges you create. Recognizing your role in the challenge, gives you the ability to resolve any problem you create.

The second source of challenges comes from other people. Learning to resolve these conflicts requires setting boundaries so other’s limitations can’t seep into your life creating chaos. Meanwhile you can offer insight, understanding and compassion to other’s who are unable or unwilling to sort out their dysfunction.

Lastly, life is about learning and overcoming and becoming your best self. Often, God, becomes a source of your challenges. He is undoubtedly hoping you will embrace the message and meet the challenge in order to lift your game and gain more confidence and capability. Don’t ignore the compliment that He is offering by bringing new growth opportunities your way.

I can promise a life much more rewarding and fulfilling when you ask “why not me?” In fact, I don’t know another way to become the person you were always meant to become. 

Very Best of Living, 

Dr. Taylor Hartman